Lesson 56 – The Insanity Inside

Answer me!
I hear nothing.
I’m told to pray.
And still nothing.
I’m told to speak with you.
I hear nothing.
To have a connection with you.
Still nothing.
I’m told you’re there.
I see nothing.
They say that Moses heard you.
I am not Moses.
They say that you visited Noah.
I have no ark.
They say that you see and hear and care for all.
But still…
You do not answer me!

Answer me!

This is why people doubt you.
This is why I doubt you.
Am I talking to myself?
I am.
Am I talking to only myself?
Is that what you are?
Or a conscience?
Or are you nothing?
You never were.
Or you once were and now are no longer.

Should I speak as though I were born centuries ago?
Oh, Holy Father –
Surely it doesn’t matter which pronoun I use for you since you are neither man nor woman?
Holy Father!
Holy Mother!
All that is holy in the sky above and the ground below and all that is in between!
Should I fall to my knees and clasp my hands above my head and flagellate myself?
Why should I?
Must I suffer to show you how true my desire to speak with you is?

There is every indication that you a cruel and temperamental being.
All the stories I’ve heard would indicate that you are as inconstant as the wind you supposedly created.
Why should I be craving the love of such a punishing creature?

Answer me!
Answer me!

Who are you to think you have the right to demand things of me?
How dare you!
I am your creator.
I am the eternal.
I am everything.
Who are you?

I am your child.
In need of a parent.
In need of guidance.
In need of nurture.

I am your creation.
You have a responsibility to me.
To us all.
If you ever were,
If you ever existed,
If you ever cared,
If you ever loved,
Hear me now.
Help me now.

Answer me.


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