Lesson 42



I had a haircut last week.
My friends have heard a lot about it.
They’ve seen pictures of it, they’ve heard me go on about it, they’ve noticed me becoming (even more) vain because of it.

The thing is though, that it has made a huge difference to my outlook on my life – particularly after feeling so under the weather in the last few weeks.
I feel like a whole new human.
I look in the mirror and see someone I am excited to be.
And it’s only because of a haircut!

I realise that big things are happening in the world that matter more than the length or colour of my locks, but when something so simple can improve my self-confidence, I feel the need to get excited about it.

In Tash Tells Tales there was a section in which I got very personal and spoke of the self-hatred I’d dealt with during my teenage years.
And I mean hatred.
That particular section discussed the fact that one day I realised I was no longer that person.
I looked in the mirror and saw someone else.
The person I am now.
Without knowing that the transition had happened.
And I wondered whether I’d notice the next change.

Well, I feel like this is the next change.
Or, at least, it’s happening from now.
And I know about this change.
And I like it.

Lesson 42

The evolution of an individual.
I like that – maybe it’s the title of my next play…
It’s a weird thing.

When you’re a kid, it’s expected you’ll evolve.
You grow, you change.
When you become an “adult”, you know that you’ll change – but most of us don’t really think about it too much.
I mean, I know that who I was at 20 is not who I’ll be at 50, let alone who I was at 30.
But I don’t consciously consider how those changes will happen – past the fact that my body is going to change.

It’s also strange to think that a haircut signals bigger changes.
But then, I think back to the fact that there’s things called “the mum cut” which is a phenomenon of new mothers chopping off long, luscious locks, there’s the particular rinses of colour that indicate women have reached a certain age and there’s the point where a balding man opts to shave it all off, rather than live with a shiny patch of scalp.
All of these changes of style signify ageing, but do they alert us to evolution of character?

Perhaps it’s something about being in the right head space to make the choice to have the haircut that is the key here?
Or maybe I’m just talking shit.
As always.

Either way, I’m looking at my reflection and seeing a whole new Tash.
And a Tash I’m not hating the sight of.
So that feels like a win.

Whether it’s the haircut that makes me feel like I’m changing or the fact that I’m changing that led me to the haircut is irrelevant – I’m growing more and more comfortable in my own skin.
And that is the definition of the evolution of character.
One that I’m happy with.

A few of my best ladies are having birthdays this month.
Birthdays are one of those other things that make me reflect upon my previous selves.
Whether the birthday is mine or otherwise.
I think back to who I was a year ago, two years ago, ten years ago.
I think back to who I was celebrating with.
And, at this time of the year, it’s kinda nice to know that I’m going to start a new year a-fresh with a whole new look…
And outlook.

I’m looking good.
And, placebo effect or not, I’m feeling good.
So, for that…




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