Lesson Two

In Lesson One I began the discussion of my people and their relationship with food.

This is not going to be the theme of every post.
BUT…
I’m not done yet.

I have questions, guys.
Questions.
And I need answers!
Well, no.
Let’s not say “answers” per se…
Let’s say –
I need another theory endorsement!

As discussed, there are rules about what us Jew-people are and are not supposed to eat.
Most people know about the pig thing.
Lots of people don’t seem to know about the seafood thing.
Apparently I blew THAT fish out of the water…
(see what I did there? #comedygoldwithtash)
… The rough explanation of this one is that the only seafood we eat (again, if you follow the rules, which I’m not saying that anyone should do) is fish.
We’re also only supposed to eat animals with an internal skeleton (so shellfish are out, as are mussels and squid and other squishy things) and if they swim, they’re supposed to have fins and scales (so shark and whale – which no-one should be eating, but for separate reasons entirely – are out). Got it? Moving on…
Then there’s this whole meat and milk thing. Which some folk know about – but mostly because they’ve heard of those who run two kitchens out of one home (which seems like a highly admirable effort – one I’m just too lazy to get involved with..)

The reasons FOR these rules are where my questions/new theory lie.

In the beginning…
These rules were passed down by some beardy people to some other beardy people (allegedly on behalf of some non-person, beardy-being) because, at the time that those rules were developed, this was a way of preventing mass food poisonings.
Fair enough.
Good call, guys.
Well played.
Mazel to your Tovs.
But…
Over time, things change.
Fires evolve into engineering marvels of oven-ry genius.
Fridges are invented.
We have culinary masterminds who’ve learnt what we can and can’t cook and eat.
Imagine how many people throughout history died taste-testing foods that led us to all the goodness we eat today! A valiant death, each and every one of those poor souls. MY SUSHI PLATTER AND I SALUTE YOU!
Well done, world!
So, these days, many a Jew choose to eat the pig, the shellfish, the mussels because WHY NOT?!
Fair dues to them, I say.
Apparently, the bacon is a wondrous thing.
Jews and gentiles alike have informed me of this fact. MANY times.
As I mentioned last post, I choose not to eat these things. I make no judgement about others and the things they choose to eat. Nor do I push my choices onto anyone else.
My choice is purely personal.
And I know it’s probably a little irrational or inconsistent or hypocritical in combination with other things I think or feel, but it’s just for me. So that’s my prerogative.

The milk and meat rule, in a nutshell (or a stuffed chicken – to continue the metaphor) is:
We’re not supposed to eat milk and meat products together. Not in the same meal.
We are supposed to leave amounts of time between consuming milk and meat products.

The reason for this rule may have also originated from the same non-poisoning agenda (again, well done beardy dudes!), but it also has an ethical reason that I quite like…
The thought being that it is cruel enough that we must kill an animal and eat it (which, pre-vegetarianism, we must do in order to survive), but then to bathe it in its mother’s milk while we do so, is like adding insult to injury.
I do sorta like this thinking.
And yet, I don’t follow this one.
Mostly because this is where the two kitchens come in to play and that IS a lot of effort (especially for one who rents).
And because, it IS my prerogative.

And now – preamble done – we get to my point!
The WHOLE reason for this post.
If we are to understand the ethical origins for this particular law, then

a) WHY do those rules apply to poultry?
– chickens and milk do NOT come from the same animals.
Thank you for the exemption of fish for this reason, but surely you’re being somewhat inconsistent, Kosher law writers..?

b) WHY don’t these rules apply instead to both milk/meat AND eggs/poultry ??
– this would be VERY annoying in finding things to cook and eat…
but surely it MAKES SENSE???

So, modern-day beardy dudes (and ladies, beardy or otherwise!) If you could sort this out, then everything will BE kosher…

You’re welcome
NB Again, any Rabbis wishing to endorse any of the #shuloftashtheories are welcome to contact me here! Please! Let’s get endorsing!
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